What To Do if My Boyfriend Forgot My Birthday?

Author: Admin

You have the right to be really angry with your boyfriend for forgetting your birthday.

Guys are not good with dates; many don’t even remember their own birthdays! Then there are other guys who really don’t place a lot of significance on celebrating birthdays in general. Whatever be the case, it’s definitely extremely careless of him to forget his girlfriend’s birthday.

Most girls are quite enthusiastic about their birthday unlike majority of guys who mostly don’t care much for theirs. But guys and girls alike like to be wished on their birthday and feel happy if they are given a present or a party. So unless he’s extremely forgetful, there is no excuse for him not remembering your birthday.

It can be really hurtful when someone close to you forgets your birthday. It can be equally hurting if your boyfriend does not get you a birthday gift. It could well mean that he’s either too busy with his own life and is losing out on “attraction” towards you or he is just too miserly, it’s usually the former.

What Should You Do?

So what should you do if your boyfriend forgets your birthday?

Let him know that you are really hurt

You don’t have to hide your feelings about him forgetting your birthday. Let him know how bad you felt about him not remembering to wish you on a day which is special to you. It’s important that he realizes what this means to you or else he would repeat the same next year.

Give him “cold” treatment for a week

This may sound really harsh but such carelessness deserves a slightly tough punishment.

Ground him for a week – no calls and definitely no physical intimacy. He is sure to remember your birthday from here on once he experiences the treatment you meted out for his forgetfulness. You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to; after all, you have to go through a tough time too if you miss him.

Ask him to make it up to you

Well, he forgot your birthday, so now he has to make amends. You can make him do anything that you wish under the pretext that he needs to make up for his mistake. Ask him to cook for you or take you out to a holiday spot or anything else that your heart desires.

Celebrate your birthday without him

This is again something you don’t have to do if it ends up spoiling your day, but if you want to show him your anger you can keep him out of your birthday party and celebrate it with your friends and family.

This can have a few repercussions on your relationship, so take a calculated decision on this. Remember that some guys are really forgetful of dates, so it may be a bit harsh on him.

Re-evaluate your relationship

If he has been acting distant and cold lately and forgetting your birthday is just one of the many instances where he has failed to show up for you, then you might want to take a closer look at your relationship.

The fact remains that when a guy really digs his girl he is quite unlikely to forget her birthday. If he’s forgotten your birthday or if he fails to get you a birthday gift, these could well be indications of a failing relationship.

Relationship takes effort and dedication to maintain. Small acts of carelessness can leave the other person feeling hurt and pained especially because the relationship means so much to them.

You can avoid yourself a lot of hurt by reminding your boyfriend of your birthday a day before, just so you don’t feel let down if he has forgotten it. This is especially required if your boyfriend has a problem with remembering dates.

  • Lilith

    The ‘cold treatment’ method sounds like you’re raising an unwanted child or something.

    Cold treatment shouldn’t be planned, it happens naturally, because you avoid the other person, because he makes you unhappy and nervous to be around at that moment, because you keep remembering what he did.

    It has nothing to do with whether he should be ‘punished’ by being left alone, that’s just stupid behaviour from the (in this case) girl’s side.

    If you féél like you want to ignore him, then do so, but if you’re only keeping yourself away from him, so that he can be ‘taught a lesson’, you’re being borderline abusive.

    My ex wanted to make clear to me that he needed me to ask him about his job more often. He didn’t feel the opportunity was there to talk about it freely, he wanted me to ask.

    Obviously, I forgot about that and would just ask how his dáy was, not his job in particular. And to him, that was a big difference. Yes, he had issues.

    One day I told him; ‘Honey, listen, I am interested in your job, but not in your college’s lives. You can tell me about your promotion and your difficult programming-situations and I’ll be all ears, but not about Jenny’s new purse and nót about Lindsay’s twins and nót about Rodriguez’s problems with the supermarkt.

    As long as they affect you, you can tell me about them. And if not, then please let’s not waste our time (Long distance calls) on their lives and talk about your feelings instead’

    He got angry and said we needed to take a break, he wanted to re-evaluate the relationship. I apologized for ‘maybe sounding a bit harsh’ and he hung up with the sentence; ‘I don’t think our relationship is going to work.’
    Since we were 3,5 years together, I was shocked, I cried my eyes out and 3 days later we had our twice-a-month-appointment, to meet up.

    He hadn’t been answering my texts, he had been ignoring each and every one of them, even a poem I’d made and send him in the night.

    I walked into the room, incredibly scared that he might break up with me (can you imagine how submissive that thought was, considering he’d been such a douchebag on the phone) and once he dramatically came out from a dark corner of the room I started crying and apologized for ‘being rude’ again.

    He then hugged me and said; ‘he had been sorry to treat me this way, but he just wanted me to realize what life would be without him and that I really needed to change things in my attitude.’

    It felt like he was pouring ice-water in my veins. I was being trained like an effing puppy. This was not love, this was abusive control. He had been ignoring me for 3 days, just because he felt I needed to be hurt a little more, to understand how angry he was. It made me think of Umbridge, wanting to imprint the message ‘a little deeper’ while carving it into Harry’s skin. No regard for feelings whatsoever.

    Then after 4,5 years, he dumped me again, for not having a spine and for being ‘damaged goods’ that needed to be fixed. His words.
    I was about to get therapy for sexual abuse in the past, tháts what freaked him out.
    And a month later, he demanded I’d get back together with him and when I declined, his friends started harassing me for a couple of months, making sure I’d remember that being a ‘coldhearted distant bitch’ made him dump me and that I wasn’t worth his love.

    Bottomline, go this way and you’re becoming a narcissist that abuses their boy or girlfriends and eventually you’ll end miserable and alone. Control issues, arrogance, a disregard for people’s feelings.

    I’m not saying that forgetting a birthday should just be forgiven, but faking anger and disappointment to ‘imprint’ the message a little better is abuse.

    Either tell him how you feel and cry your eyes out (with real tears) or just make verbally clear that you were very hurt.
    Don’t go and treat him like a child if you want him to act like a man. Same story with the men and their girlfriends.

    • Mia

      I read this twice but I still think that you also had issues..