It may come as a surprise to a vast majority of women to realize that men are actually way much more sensitive than they are given credit for. In fact most men are regular “softies”; they tend to weep when alone if they feel hurt or when they are going through a loss in their life.
It’s true however that most men are quite defiant about expressing emotions in public or even in front of their partner at times.
Many men do come across as being insensitive, though it would hardly be the case if you really get to know them deep down. The pertinent question then is why are men “acting” insensitive all the time? Here are some common reasons why this happens.
Some Men are afraid to get hurt
The male ego has been built up into an “institution”. Men take themselves a little too seriously because of some false beliefs and conditioning that they hold as true. They avoid coming across as “sensitive” because they feel they will be ridiculed and hence be “hurt”.
In a way this actually turns out to be true because in certain societies “sensitive” men are sometimes looked down upon. All men are human and have the entire range of human emotions, there is nothing like an insensitive human. Humanness implies “sentience”. It’s just that men don’t want to be put down or ridiculed for their sensitivity, so they hide it.
Some men go into their “heads” losing touch with their hearts
‘A man cannot afford to be careless’, says the Godfather in the much acclaimed movie. This is usually the undertone of all male upbringings. So a man starts trying to be more “responsible”; he tries to stay ahead of the “so called” competition by becoming calculative and manipulative. He starts living completely from his mind, losing touch with his inherent humanness or heart.
When you start living in your mind it becomes difficult to empathize with people because you are always thinking about yourself and judging others. Women are said to be closer to their heart than men, this is evident in the “giving” nature that most women have.
Are Women to Blame?
Have you noticed how some girls avoid or distance themselves from a sensitive guy? These girls are brought up to believe that they should look for qualities of manliness such as ambition, coldness and “drive” in their man. So they become quite narrow in their thinking and start judging the sensitivity of men. In order to woo such girls a man starts pretending to be “insensitive” or cold. He starts living up to their definition of what “manliness” should be.
Men are no longer needed to continue their role of being the “protector” as was the case during the primitive ages, but for some reason the mindset still prevails. Some women are still looking for a “protector” rather than a close partner.
Man and woman have different energies but they have a common ground in their humanness, a lack of appreciation for this truth is what leads to alienation.
In conclusion, instead of judging a man as being insensitive it’s important to look deeper and see the humanness in him. In some men it might be difficult to see through the mask of indifference that they wear to protect themselves, but the vulnerability is there. We are all humans first, male and female is just an upper layer of difference.